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The Problem With Me Is...

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I'm on a constant roller coaster. Obsessed with love, obsessed with longing and affection,  but I also... 

Push others away, accuse, beg, plead. 

Everything just hurts 'too much'. 

Sometimes,  I'll take a razor and cut my skin... sometimes I want to end my life... 

Yet, I'm silenced. 

I was silenced through the yelling,  the accusations,  the emotion , mental and psycological abuse.  How does one explain that?  

An anchor wrapped around my ankle, and being drown because it gets deeper and deeper?

The only thing is I don't die...

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