When I was at the age of 6 I was glad to go to school.
It was my first day and I thought it'll be such a great time .. who even knew that things could change that hardly? Well as I took the first footstep I felt that I don't belong in here. I slowly heard how girls and boys had a laugh at me and how the fuck they were spreading rumlurs 'round. I needed to fight that for such a long time .. Untill that one day ... A girl called 'Natasha' had birthday .. Everyone got an invitation for the party dxcept me ... She lived next to me .. From the window I've seen how they were laughing and having fun .. I was a little girl and I have had enough .. I went to the bathroom and looked up to the mirror ... All I could see was such a girl with bloody eyes ... tired of beeing here.. Tired of expecting the worst ... Tired of her tears .. She took the blade and turned the ice cold water on and went inside ... She started to cut herself ... She didn't want to live with this pain anymore ... That girl was me .. It's just really sad knowing to have a bad past and to fe these feelings come back ..It's hard to know that I've ben through so much and it feels like shit when you're sick but no one accepts you as who you really are ... Depression,Hatred and an Emotional Chaos and many more are things I fight with ... Everday ...