My mother's lips move but all I hear is thunder The hollow sound of her heavy smile mimics laughter As it echoes far away in my head I run outside, her memories chasing me The rain kissing my barbed-wire skin With ice, creating a new layer of fragility Over my glass-cut suit of armor Lightning laces the sky and shocks my heart Destroying every reminder of staying strong The salt of the rain creates a river of emptiness Revealing who it is I look like for the first time I am too shy to cry in front of the mirrors That drown me in her yesterdays, those reflections Whose eyes I try desperately to avoid The same way my older brother looks away from me And when mourning comes once again I have to refrain from using the jagged edges Of broken silhouettes to cut off my face and remove The burden of wearing the woman I didn't love enough