Would this be a good song?

[Adam5]

Loves memory has traced our outline in this place.
But will the spider remember, or the sun?
Did the water capture our faces in permanence?
Does the wind create us anew as it blows?
Did the shadows from the trees record our passage beneath them?
Our secret been revealed.
Yet I have told no other.
I write these words in silence, in mute testimony
To what once was.
But our image remains alive in this place.
It can not be removed.
You, me,
We then,
Were here.
We saw the day and hoped for tomorrow.
We caught a brief glimpse of love's promise.
We were not liars,
But thieves of time.
For now time has now forgotten us,
Yet our memory lingers, and love remembers
This place that was ours.
 

okay for Fans of Metal/screamo/emo

i made a metal version and a emo version of this song me and my band made

but i was wondering if you all would think this makes a good song?

ill post it on the website

 

if any of you have ideas are remakes of this song pleas message me or tell me so i could [play this song your version]

[~Flo~]

The lyrics are really great, I'd just wanna know if there is a 'screamo' version, I'd wanna know where the screams are placed, maybe if you post up the song here or on YouTube I'll get a idea. But over all i like it i think its really good ^.^

Edited December 27, 2013 by Xochiquetzal15

[Adam5]

Yea there is a screamo part

i just need to get me and my band together so we could play it

when i post it on youtube ill message you the link

[~Flo~]

Okie doke, thanks \(^.^)/