Am I doing what's right?

[SuicideDoll]

I'm really confused right now, I'm having a hard time figuring if I'm a good person or a bad person... I seem to piss everyone off so does that make me a bad person? What really makes a person bad? I feel like, maybe I am a bad person, because I cut myself without considering my friends or any of the other people who care. Sometimes I wonder if there are any really.. but that's aside the point. I try to help and protect people, does that make me a good person? You can't be both, right? Maybe I'm a bad person because I don't care too much about myself. I don't know. Have I been doing what's right in my life? Have I been who I need to be? It seems like everything I've done is written in stone now and it pains me because I know I haven't made the best of choices. I never have. I make people cry because I simply cannot care enough, though I try, does this make me a bad person? It seems like my bad is greater than my good. Maybe my intentions are good but the result is ALWAYS bad. What kind of person am I to want to protect my friends but find myself unable to protect even me? I already know If must be an awful influence, I'm also an awful daughter. An awful friend. And obviously just a terrible person who can't help anyone. Ever just feel so pathetic like you aren't in control of your life or your choices, like you're constantly backed into a corner. It's like being jerked around in a closed box, so suffocating and painful. I'm trying to better myself but I don't know if I really can.I'm not capable of such a thing. Everyone around me will suffer because I don't have the strength to be a better person. So tell me, am I doing what's right by staying alive? Be honest. Do I strike you as a bitch who needs to die? Multiple people have told me I should do it already. But I've already tried to die so many times and all I got called was selfish and I guess it is a little selfish, if you're not seeing it from my point of view. I see myself as a smudge on a perfectly clean window. Am I doing what's right? I don't even know anymore.

[Ghostface Killah]

There is no "Good" person or "Bad" person... there are only "Persons". Everything you do, is mixed. In this world, there are only a few "Saints" and "Sinners"... Everyone else is a compound: a mixture between "Good" and "Evil". We all have people we've wronged, and things we've done right. Just do what you think is good. Follow your instincts. And cutting; that's self-mutilation, that's not harming others. That's harming yourself. You make your own choices about that, but I strongly advise against it.

[SuicideDoll]

You see I don't believe in the mixes of good and bad. And I already cut myself, my friends are probably sick of worrying about me. It's too bad I don't have much of an instinct to live

[cuzican]

i think u can definately be both because everybody does good things and everybody does bad things

for example:________ a man robbing a million dollars from a bank and killing a guard to do it ut then he donates it to charity

and ur not a bad person for expressing how u feel

[punk301]

An old native American saying says that there are two wolves in us all a good wolf and a bad wolf they are constantly fighting for control in the end the one that wins is the one we feed, you may say you dont believe in a mix of good and evil but I'm afraid its not up to you the world is not black and white it is gray all around, where evil dwells there is good to battle it, where the is good evil is there to shut it down unfortunatly we dont live in a perfect world so the best thing you should do is to the right thing and truly we can only do that if we listen to our hearts and use a little common sense

[SuicideDoll]

I get what you're saying but really, the world is different for different people. I mean, everyone has their own view of the way the world is and how the people in it are. I'm a neutral person, always. So to me, it's an imbalance to have gray. Therefore there is only black and white in my eyes. This is how I see the world. My favorite colors have always been black and white(of course), because they're very forward colors. They are candid colors, showing the world how it is. But also, for me, it's like everyday is just another day that I'm backed against a wall. Though indifference is what keeps me alive and going. And really, humans are just animals, so tell me, what does an animal do when it's injured, scared, and backed into a corner? I wish common sense could guide me, but my thoughts are often so erratic and illogical that my common sense remains unheard. A little off topic but I can't ever hear my own thoughts. There's just silence in my head, is it supposed to be like that? Every now and then I'll hear a faint whisper of a thought, but like I said, they're erratic and illogical. It's hard to understand what's my heart and what's my mind.