My poem?

[ShadowVein]

What do you think of it? I don't think it's very good. How can I make it better?

 

Death is dark and sweet,

for the one who drifts

into the void.

 

For those who remain,

Death is sad, and cruel,

taking those

who are most important

and loved.

 

But the one who has died

will sometimes stay

drifting, watching, guarding,

those

who had to stay.

 

And this one?

 

A bird with four wings,

Two in front, two in back,

rather like dogs

have legs.

A bird,

speckled creamy brown and soft white

yellow beak, sharp claws

A bird

Racing

Determined,

to get where it needs,

Or perhaps

this bird simply loves

Speed, solid air

gushing under and over

each wing.

[Catch&Release]

I like the description and detail