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Found 14 results

  1. This is a poem/story I wrote not too long ago. Enjoy~ A cold, dark, lonely room, Empty, devoid of life Save for one soul A girl sits, huddled in her corner Pale moonlight spilling in through the window adjacent to her Licking her toes Her arms are wrapped around her knees Tears are slowly streaming down her pale cheeks Yet, she feels nothing There is not a sound But yet so many in her head All the voices, all the memories Will never leave her mind She grips her leg at this thought So hard, Wiling the thoughts to empty out of her mind So hard, Invisible blood leaks from her wounds Internally For the girl can no longer bleed at all She is waiting, forever watching the world Through cold and uncaring eyes She can never be part of it She can never be who she once was Back when she was alive Back when she was whole She is doomed to this eternal existence This is truly no existence at all, She cannot feel But yet she weeps For the memories are so strong So potent It feels as though she can reach out and touch them To be alive again To feel the warmth of the sun Rather than the endless cold For many years, She simply watched Watched her family grow old Moved on, Without her Her mother never stopped crying Eventually, Her father’s alcohol addiction proved fatal He was never much of a drinker Till his daughter killed herself On that tragic day, He became wild, violent So uncaring, Her mother confined herself to her bedroom Not eating, Nor drinking Nor living, Her brother began to experiment with poisons A taste the tongue could not acquire enough of “It’s just a cut” His sister had said to him “It really helps me” “But it hurts me”, He had said to her Just a cut Just a scratch Where did it all begin? When did she grow so cold? It was just a cut They were just words But now she watches, So lifeless, No one took notice Of the soul that slowly withered inside Everything had been burned away Crumbled to ash Belongings left to dust That day the bullet entered her brain, Her room remained the same Although her brother often entered Held her photo And cried, He touched her things He tried to never forget Those wounds that ripped open Just by looking Her smell was fading Dust collected on her things, Slowly, Her brother stopped visiting, The room was boarded up, Left to rot Memories left to fade, Please don’t forget me, She pleads to the empty house She watched, Helplessly She watched her mother slowly faded away Something akin to death Lonely So cold So broken Forever broken Her best friend always blamed herself And became so reckless Pregnant at 19 years old, No father to be found Eventually, she overdosed On heroine Died in a cold dark alley One snowy Christmas Her child frozen in her arms The bully never forgot what she had done Never forgot anything Not a single word Started cutting words into her skin All those words, that helped her sin Went to therapy But not much worked Forever awake Never to sleep again The girl remembers the day That she died It was no quick deed But over time With every word A little more of her died Till she was just a husk An empty shell of a person The teachers noticed the signs But never acted “It’s just a phase.” They all had said They had seen the cuts They had seen the scars on the girl’s wrists They will never forget The regret will never fade The boy that had secretly admired her Keeps her picture tucked under his pillow And whispers to it every night “If only I had said something sooner” “No.” The girl whispered at last This can’t be right. She had never intended All of this She just wanted relief For the pain to end Never did she think That she would hurt so many The object of nightmares and regret No This was never how she wanted to be remembered She wished She could have told mom “It was never your fault.” And that she loved her And that she loved dad He was not the weak one She wished she could tell her brother “Drugs are more harmful to the body than cutting”, “Please don’t destroy yourself anymore” She wanted to tell the teachers It was her fault for not speaking up She longed to whisper to the bully “I forgive you.” “Don’t end up like me.” She wished to tell her best friend, “Everything will be okay.” She wanted to tell the boy “It’s okay. I will never forget you.” More than anything She wanted to tell them all “Please live, and never forget me.” If only they knew How badly she wanted them to live Because life is precious And she had wasted it Each tear, Another regret, Another memory, That slowly fades into nothing Now she sits, All alone As the world keeps turning In an empty house Full of regret Full of longing Staring out the window Remembering what had once been Her life
  2. From the album: Crazy

    That's what I say!
  3. As I lay in the cold,lonely,black darkness I think to myself 'What did I ever do to deserve this?' My heart is shattered my life is ruined and my wrist are bleeding I watch as my dark red blood pours out onto my skin I smile as tear stream down my face And now I go,fading into blackness and my world starts spinning I am slowly slipping away from this nightmare
  4. If you or someone you know needs help, but isn't comfortable with going to a counselor right away, there is a website that is VERY good to go to for any questions you may have, or even jus an ear if you need to talk. It's a bit strict on what you can post, but VERY helpful. Mainly designed for suicidal people, it also has various other forums for depression, anxiety, PTSD, DID, and many other disorders, as well as suicide, loss. and a chat. I recommend it for anyone who wants help, but isn't comfortable with going to a therepist or even posting on here. www.suicideforum.com/
  5. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and perhaps so are you. But the roses have wilted, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty, your wrists are stained red. The sun isn't shining, the sky isn't clear, there's no silver lining cause you're no longer here. Rain keeps pouring, there's no end in sight, you're laying there frozen, so far from the light. Your beauty's unreal, your smile the sun, but time can't be turned nor your actions undone. The words that you wrote that I only read, "I love you so much; please don't cry when I'm dead." A bond that we formed, a love that ran deep, a pain that we shared, a friend I could keep. I wanted to hold you, wipe the tears from your eyes; been there the moment you said your goodbye. I want to forget but the most times I don't. I want to let go, but I know that I won't. Tears on my face, memories burned in my head; the roses have wilted, the violets are dead.
  6. a cutter with clean wrist impossible they say but then they checked her hips it wasn't good noway her sides where chopped and slashed but a secret it was kept even by the ones who said they truly loved her best she cried quietly in a corner never let her parents see that there perfect little angel was as broken as can be she cried into a corner where depression took the wheel convinced her to do tragic things no bandage could heel she kept on cutting and cutting but still nobody told and then one day she took her life her body unmoving and cold they said she wasn't bullied but maby the little things count they told her what she was some days a freak weirdo burnout these things add up you know although she said she didn't care they made her want to yell scream and rip out her own hair it may not look like bullying but people take things to the heart so maby we should stop doing this to people stop suicide were it starts -c.c.
  7. i sat there forced to whatch you in your despair all i could do was whatch and stare i couldnt do a thing to save your life i had to whatch you in your strife you said you were fine but i know you lied i had to whatch you when you died now your gone and i am lost your death had the highest cost now im lost in my despair while others can only whatch and stare they cant do a thing to save my life but sit and whatch me in my strife i say im fine but they know i lie they must sit and whatch me die.
  8. No one really listens to me. And right now I REALLY need a friend to talk to. I don't have really anyone I can talk to anymore. I really think I just scrude up my hole life. I need some cheering up.. I'm well I tend to have the thought of suicide and self harm problems. Im really depressed person who holds in and hide all their emotions in. Im really sad no matter how happy I act at times. I told my mom that I have depression problems but she doesn't really beleive me. Recently I had been soo happy. I'd stopped thinking about my depression and I was happy almost constantintly for once in 3 years. (Im 14 years old right now.) What made me happy was this guy we where dating. Everything started going downhill when I got into a fist fight as school bc a girl sent a nude picture of herself to my boyfriend at the time to his fone. (i have a video of the fight up on youtube too.) And that day right before that fight I got into happened me and him did some "stuff". And I think I might be pregnant. It's been awhile now and im getting to way worried. It's been 40 days since my last "girly week". The guy who might be a daddy broke up with my for my best-friend (well ex best-friend now). She knows that I love him and I might be too that's the worst part. Im a "cutter"... and i tried to kill myself when he broke up with me and told me he's datting some other girl.. (He told my mom that i cutted myself too.). He knows I litterly can't live without him in my life. You might think im being over dramatic but you don't know what I have been throught. Everyone says to me he's just a piece of shit and i'll find some one else. That he's not worth the tears.. or any of it. That i should mover on... But im maddly in love with him. iv never loved someone as much as him. She was one of the first person I went up to and told everything to. She watched me cry on one of my other best-friend shoulder bc of him. My best-friend tells me she's the one dating him now a few days later after we broke up. She even says he's a piece of shit too.. And the guy basically told me he wants nothing to do with me anymore. But yet he keeps saying how sorry he is and he still loves me he just don't want to be with me anymore... o.O I told some of my close friends that I think I might be pregnant and I told some other people that I was and one of them was some what still close to me even tho me and one of my ex bf hear me and we where close before we broke up over the summer. But he goes and tells everyone after i told him not too... So now the hole entire high school knows I might be pregnant. I don't care but I do at the same time. The only reason why I care is bc the possible daddy he's saying some really nasty things and making thing even worse than what they are. My mom knows everything and I think that she hates me now. ): We got a test and i took it on friday.. and my mom says if my period doesn't come by my doctors appointment on the 12th where going to take another test at the doctors. Im having the hardest time handling this I don't know if I should stay or go.. I been giving up complelty on everthing not even trying anymore.... I can't handle this..
  9. Intro: Every night, I lie awake in my bed. All I hear is screaming, fighting, is it something I did? I try to sleep but all I hear are these voices in my head. My heart is breaking, my world is changing. Chorus: Why, do I have to say goodbye, to everything I know and love for the rest of my life? Why do I have to hear you fight, every single day and night? Why do you have to make me cry, I'm tired of living in your lies.. I'm spinning round and round. I can't find the ground. It's crumbling beneath me. I toss and turn, I can't find my way out. I have no shelter, no protectors. Repeat Chorus: Why, do I have to say goodbye, to everything I know and love for the rest of my life? Why do I have to hear you fight, every single day and night? Why do you have to make me cry, I'm tired of living in your lies.. I'm slowly breaking down. The real me can't be found. You destroyed what was left and I'll never forget. You made me believe I just wasn't worth it.. Repeat Chorus: Why, do I have to say goodbye, to everything I know and love for the rest of my life? Why do I have to hear you fight, every single day and night? Why do you have to make me cry, I'm tired of living in your lies.. I'm finding my way out. I can hear the sirens sound. As you run through the crowd, the silence breaks you down. The fighting is dropped, as my heart beat is stopped..
  10. I'm starting this because I think highly of all of you and want to keep you here. But this is not the equivalent to going outside, laying in the grass, and staring at the clouds. If you feel suicidal, please tell somebody off of the internet. This is going to be a thread about coping. So share your story..ready..set..go. I'm here for you guys 100% because you've been here for me.
  11. What the he'll isnwrong with me?why has my life gone so far down hill... Maybe the pol here are right, I'm nothing but an ugly ass nothing and grr :,/ someone message me to just talk?
  12. Guys, I really need your help. I just want the pain to end already. But the only thing I can think of is suicide. But I won't do it unless there really is no other option. Help, please?
  13. I let the lies get inside of me I let them tell me what was right and wrong You told her all the things you had wished i said.. You had made up lies just to get her mad at me Well they worked Good job Good job at almost ruining my life, making me almost commit suicide, start cutting and make me realize who's my friend and who's not Good job
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